|
|
 |
|
|
|
Hello Inner Circle Members! :)
I'm excited to continue our journey together, learning about the importance of self-compassion. When it comes to healing, particularly in nurturing our nervous system, few things have greater transformative power. Without self-compassion, we cannot create internal safety, and without internal safety, the nervous system cannot heal.
Learning how to cultivate self-compassion has been pivotal in my own health, as it allows all the pain to surface, be acknowledged, and tended to. The bottom line is that healing simply won't happen without it. So, make sure you're all ears and ready for action, because few things will enhance our health and happiness more than this essential practice. |
|
|
|
TOPIC OF THE MONTH |
|
Self-Compassion: The Gateway To All Healing & Growth |
|
If you've followed me for long or taken any of my programs, you know that I often share how learning to process my emotions has improved my health more than anything else! The reason for this is that repressed emotions contribute to chronic fight or flight, or a sympathetic dominant nervous system state, leading to nervous system dysregulation. When trying to heal, many focus on lowering the stress in their lives to improve health and happiness. However, what affects our health more than the stress we're aware of (conscious stress) is the stress we're not aware of (unconscious stress), which includes our repressed emotions. And from years of experience, I can tell you that most of us have a lifetime of repressed emotions lurking right under the surface, contributing to a chronic state of fight or flight.
Research shows that processing our emotions effectively moves the body out of fight or flight. One of the main obstacles to this is a lack of self-compassion. If we cannot acknowledge and meet our suffering with love, we will not be able to process our emotions and move the body out of fight or flight.
Imagine a lack of self-compassion as a tight lid keeping all those repressed emotions trapped below the surface. Self-compassion acts as the key, unlocking that lid and allowing all our emotional pain to rise up where it can be acknowledged, processed, and embraced with love and kindness.
The entire premise around self-compassion is caring enough about ourselves to want to ease our suffering. So, when we cannot acknowledge our suffering and meet it with self-compassion, we cannot tend to it or heal it.
Another crucial reason why self-compassion plays a pivotal role in processing emotions is that if we harbor a harsh inner critic (and let's be honest, most of us do), our emotions will never feel safe enough to surface. Creating a safe environment is imperative for healing. Repressed emotions need to transition from being buried deep in the unconscious mind to the conscious mind, and this transition won't occur without the right supportive environment.
I vividly remember the day I made the decision to start being kinder to myself—it was truly life-changing! Finally, I realized the importance of this work and actively began to observe and become aware of how much I was tearing myself down with that constant inner voice of criticism, and the immense stress and suffering it was causing me. It was a huge wake-up call to see how my own inner critic was contributing to my stress levels and overall unhappiness. It felt incredibly empowering to identify the root cause of so much of my stress and suffering and to know that I had the power to replace criticism with kindness, to become my own support system. And let me tell you, this shift has contributed more to my healing than ANYTHING else!
Our cells are listening to every word we say, and even though many of us are not even aware of how toxic our inner dialogue is, our body knows and FEELS IT ALL! And once we acknowledge it, it's as if the storm inside us can finally start to calm, the body finally feels safe, and this is when we're able to process a lifetime of repressed emotions, meeting each one with a kind and loving presence, acknowledging our pain and tending to it.
When we offer ourselves the love that we give others, the love that we deserve, we can finally feel like we're enough. From my experience, the majority of the people I work with never feel like they're enough, so they’re constantly generating and repressing shame, the most corrosive emotion one can experience. Self-compassion is the antidote to shame. However, simply telling ourselves that we are enough, especially when we don't feel like it, doesn't do much to improve how we feel about ourselves, but SHOWING ourselves that we are enough—by actively being kind and loving toward ourselves—changes everything and is the most healing work you can ever do!
Friends, it’s simple: A lack of self-compassion sends a constant danger signal to the brain and nervous system, triggering the stress response. In contrast, offering ourselves self-compassion activates the opposite and sends messages of safety, balancing the nervous system. This is why there are few things more important than this when it comes to healing from chronic symptoms, preventing further health issues, and just being happy and content in our lives. In fact, it's so important that I don't believe we can heal or be truly happy without this work.
As most of you know, I've spent the last two decades of my life researching every aspect of health and what moves the needle most when it comes to people's healing. I can tell you, learning how to cultivate self-compassion is at the top of the list! This week in our workshop, we're going to learn some powerful ways to practice cultivating self-compassion, and I can't wait to share this transformative work with you. |
|
|
|
WHAT I'M LISTENING TO |
|
|
|
|
As we journey toward self-compassion, I stumbled upon an old video that resonated deeply. It shed light on why our inner critic doesn't push us forward, but rather holds us back. It's funny how we often think that without this critical voice, we'd become less motivated or lazy, which isn't true at all. In the video, Kristen Neff talks about how self-compassion is actually about wanting health and well-being for ourselves. It's about not wanting to suffer, so it's not about becoming complacent and losing our edge. It's more about nurturing ourselves in a way that allows us to really thrive! |
| LISTEN NOW |
|
|
|
|
I also recently stumbled across Dr. Christopher Germer, a psychologist who specializes in self-compassion, and I appreciated his perspective and powerful testimony about how he healed his anxiety with self-compassion. I also enjoyed his guided meditation toward the end of his video. Enjoy!
|
| LISTEN NOW |
|
|
|
WHAT I'M READING |
|
|
|
|
This article highlights how self-compassion acts as the antidote to shame, an emotion that has a profound impact our well-being. Shame, often experienced both consciously and unconsciously, has been linked to various health issues, both physical and mental. In fact, research suggests that chronic feelings of shame contribute to stress, anxiety, depression, and even physical ailments such as heart disease and immune system dysfunction. By fostering self-compassion, we can disrupt this cycle of shame-induced distress and mitigate the harmful effects of shame.
|
|
|
|
|
Taking self-compassion into the realm of how we nourish ourselves is important. It's essential to allow ourselves pleasure with occasional treats, but, as Kristin Neff says, it's not about giving ourselves all the treats we want because self-compassion still prioritizes what's truly best for our well-being. Healthier treats serve as a personal example of this concept - we can enjoy a treat without sabotaging our health in the process. Consider a healthy treat that is still dense with nutrients, balanced with protein and fiber to prevent spikes in blood sugar levels. This allows us to indulge in a treat, like the ooey-gooey chocolatey delight below (a favorite of mine), without compromising our health. ENJOY :)
|
| CHOC CHIP BLONDIES |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Speaking of a delicious chocolatey treat, this drink is much the same in that it's nutrient-dense, adding to my health yet absolutely indulgent and delicious. Organifi makes the best-tasting superfood blends. If you have not tried this, it's perfect for squelching a sweet tooth and adding more nutrients to your diet in the most tasty way, not to mention it's amazing for hormone balance as depleted hormones are a common issue in today's stressed-out world. |
|
USE CODE: ORGANIFIKATE |
| ORGANIFI HARMONY |
|
|
|
|
A wise doctor once told me, disease occurs for two primary reasons: either because our bodies become deficient or because they become toxic. This really resonated with me, especially when considering the air we breathe.
It's alarming to think about how many chemicals and pollutants are present in indoor air, contributing to our body's toxic load. That's why taking proactive steps to improve indoor air quality, such as using air purifiers like Air Doctor, is so crucial. By filtering out those harmful substances, we're reducing the toxic burden on our bodies and creating a healthier living environment.
So, not only are air purifiers beneficial for filtering out pollutants, but they're also an investment in our long-term health and well-being, helping to minimize the risk of developing health issues associated with poor indoor air quality.
I've been using Air Doctor purifiers for over five years now, and I can't recommend them enough. They've made a noticeable difference in the air quality of my home, especially during seasons like wildfire season here in the northwest, when smoke can really affect indoor air. Plus, having that gentle white noise in the background as it works is actually quite soothing, especially at night.
I highly recommend taking advantage of their biggest sale of the year. It's a great opportunity to prioritize your health and well-being by ensuring you're breathing clean, fresh air at home.
|
 |
| AIR DOCTOR |
|
|
|
|
Self-compassion is all about learning how to receive love from ourselves, something that many of us struggle with. However, one way we can improve is by practicing receiving love and support from others. As we experience this support from our friends, family, and this community, we gradually learn to extend that same kindness and understanding to ourselves.
This is one of the main reasons why I started the inner circle – to create a space where we can love and support each other on our healing journeys. I encourage all of you to open up and share vulnerably, knowing that this community is here for you, ready to meet your struggles with love and support. It truly is crucial in your healing journey.
As we become better at receiving love from others, we also become better at offering love to ourselves. This reciprocal relationship between receiving and giving love is fundamental to self-compassion. By nurturing a supportive community and practicing self-compassion, we create a positive cycle where love flows freely, both inward and outward, fostering healing and growth. |
|
|
|
|
|
|
UPCOMING EVENTS |
|
Our next workshop is this Thursday, March 28th, at 11 am PST. I'm looking forward to seeing you all there! And as always, they are recorded for those who cannot make it live, ensuring that everyone can access the valuable content at their convenience. |
|
|
|
CLOSING THOUGHTS |
|
|
|
|
I firmly believe that there are few health pursuits more impactful than nurturing self-compassion. It's crucial to dedicate time to learn about it and weave it into your daily life. This skill holds immense potential to profoundly influence your health and happiness. However, it's not a quick fix; it's a continuous journey. It requires consistent effort, not just attending workshops or listening to podcasts. Self-compassion is a lifestyle—a commitment to prioritize kindness towards yourself, gradually quieting your inner critic, and embracing self-love and kindness wholeheartedly. IT IS THE BEST WORK YOU WILL EVER DO! |
|
|
|
REMINDERS |
|
Don't forget, our live Zoom call is on this Thursday, March 28th, where we'll be diving into all things self-compassion! Looking forward to seeing you all there. :) |
|
|
|
|
